An Indian goes to Australia and goes to Woolworths (A grocery store in
Australia). He finds cat food at special prices. He picks a dozen cans of
cat food and goes to check out.
The Manager gets suspicious. He thinks that this guy cannot have a cat and
will probably feed cat food to his kids. He asks the Indian to show him his
cat before he could let him have cat food. The Indian goes home and returns
with a cat and gets to buy the cat food.
Next week the Indian finds dog food at special prices. He picks a dozen
cans of dog food and goes to check out.
The Manager again gets suspicious. He thinks that this guy has a cat but he
cannot have a dog and he will probably feed dog-food to his kids. He asks
the Indian to bring and show him the dog before he can let him have dog
food.
The Sardar goes home and returns with a dog. He gets to buy the dog food.
Next week the Indian comes to Woolworths with a bag. He asks the manager to
put his hand in the bag.
The Manager puts his hand in the bag, feels some thing slimy and
immediately takes it out. He shouts at the Indian, What the F*** is this?
Is this shit you Idiot?
The Indian calmly replies, "Yes, and I want to buy toilet paper."
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Fwd: Joke Of the Day (TWO GHOSTS!)
Two ghosts met and both chat about how they died.
1st ghost: How u died?
2nd ghost: I died of cold.
1st ghost: How does it feel when you're dying in cold?
2nd ghost: Actually, I was imprisoned in the refrigerator. Initially, I was shivering, then my whole body started to freeze, later I felt the whole world was dark and I died. Fortunately, I died with not much sufferings.
1st ghost: You're so pityful....
2nd ghost: How about you? How did u die?
1st ghost: I died from heart attack.
2nd ghost: I see, why did u have a heart attack?
1st ghost: Actually, I found out that my wife is having an affair with another man. One day, when I came back from work, saw a pair of man shoes outside my house. Then, I realized that the guy was in my house with my wife. When I rushed into the bedroom, my wife was alone. I must find where that bastard is hiding. So I searched the toilet, I ran downstairs, looked in the storeroom, but the bastard was not there. So, I ran upstairs and searched the wardrobe, but I found nothing. Because I was too tired of all that running,I got a heart attack and died.
2nd ghost: Why didn't you look for the bastard in the fridge? If you did, both of us were alive now!!
1st ghost: How u died?
2nd ghost: I died of cold.
1st ghost: How does it feel when you're dying in cold?
2nd ghost: Actually, I was imprisoned in the refrigerator. Initially, I was shivering, then my whole body started to freeze, later I felt the whole world was dark and I died. Fortunately, I died with not much sufferings.
1st ghost: You're so pityful....
2nd ghost: How about you? How did u die?
1st ghost: I died from heart attack.
2nd ghost: I see, why did u have a heart attack?
1st ghost: Actually, I found out that my wife is having an affair with another man. One day, when I came back from work, saw a pair of man shoes outside my house. Then, I realized that the guy was in my house with my wife. When I rushed into the bedroom, my wife was alone. I must find where that bastard is hiding. So I searched the toilet, I ran downstairs, looked in the storeroom, but the bastard was not there. So, I ran upstairs and searched the wardrobe, but I found nothing. Because I was too tired of all that running,I got a heart attack and died.
2nd ghost: Why didn't you look for the bastard in the fridge? If you did, both of us were alive now!!
Friday, July 17, 2009
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Fwd: Why wedding ring should be put on the fourth finger?
This is interesting!
Why wedding ring should be put on the fourth finger??
Thumb represents parents
Second finger represents brothers & sisters
Center finger represents own self
Fourth finger represents your partner
Last finger represents your children
Really
interesting
Why wedding ring should be put on the fourth finger??
Pls read the following, you may not believe that really god made this a miracle (this is from a Chinese excerpt) but still interesting!
Firstly, join your palms as shown in photo below, center finger bend and put together back to back
Secondly, let the rest of the 4 fingers touch tips to tip
Game begins, follow the instructions below for all the 5 fingers but only 1 pair can split.
Try to open your thumb, the thumb represents parents, it can be opened because .... ............. Whoever may be, our parents will leave us one day.
Please close up your thumb, Then open your second finger, this finger represents brothers and sisters, they do have their own family which is the reason
that they will leave us too. Now close up your second finger,
Open up your little finger, this represents your children.. Sooner or later they too will leave us for they got they own living to live nevertheless, close up your little finger,
Try to open your fourth finger in which we put our wedding ring; you will be surprised to find that it cannot be opened at all. Because it represents husband and wife, this whole life you will be attached to each other
Real love will stick together ever and forever. . . ………..
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Fwd: The 7 Dangerous Act after meal
THE SEVEN DANGEROUS
DON'T ACT THE 7 ACTIONS BELOW
AFTER YOU HAVE A MEAL
* Don't smoke- Experiment from experts proves that smoking a cigarette after meal is comparable to smoking 10 cigarettes (chances of cancer is higher).
* Don't eat fruits immediately - Immediately eating fruits after meals will cause stomach to be bloated with air. Therefore take fruit 1-2 hr after meal or 1hr before meal.
* Don't drink tea - Because tea leaves contain a high content of acid. This substance will cause the Protein content in the food we consume to be hardened thus difficult to digest.
* Don't loosen your belt - Loosening the belt after a meal will easily cause the intestine to be twisted & blocked.
* Don't bathe - Bathing after meal will cause the increase of blood flow to the hands, legs & body thus the amount of blood around the stomach will therefore decrease. This will weaken the digestive system in our stomach.
* Don't walk about - People always say that after a meal walk a hundred steps and you will live till 99. In actual fact this is not true. Walking will cause the digestive system to be unable to absorb the nutrition from the food we intake.
* Don't sleep immediately - The food we intake will not be able to digest properly. Thus will lead to gastric & infection in our intestine.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Fwd: A second before death...
Photos taken from the GOL B 737 aircraft accident in Brazil
Last month a B737 had a mid air collision with a Embraer Legacy while cruising at 35,000 feet over South America . The Embraer Legacy, though seriously damaged, with the winglet ripped off, managed to make a landing at a nearby airstrip in the midst of the Amazon jungle.. The crew and passengers of the Embraer Legacy had no idea what they had hit. The B737,however, crashed killing all crew and passengers on board.. The two photos attached above were apparently taken by one of the passengers in the B737, after the collision and before the aircraft
crashed. The photos were retrieved from the camera's memory stick. You will never get to see photos like this. In the first photo there is a gaping hole in the fuselage through which you can see the tailplane and vertical fin of the aircraft. In the second photo one of the passengers
is being sucked out of the gaping hole.
Photos taken inside the plane.
Fwd: A doctor's wisdom
A worried woman went to her gynecologist and said: 'Doctor, I have a serious
problem and desperately need your help! My baby is not even 1 yr. old and I'm pregnant again. I don't want kids so close together.'
So the doctor said: 'Ok, and what do you want me to do?'
She said: 'I want you to end my pregnancy, and I'm counting on your help with this.'
The doctor thought for a little while, and after some silence he said to the lady: 'I think I have a better solution for your problem. It's less dangerous for you too.'
She smiled, thinking that the doctor was going to accept her request.
Then he continued: 'You see, in order for you not to have to take care of two babies at the same time, let's kill the one in your arms. That way, you could rest some before the other one is born. If we're going to kill one of them, it doesn't matter which one it is. There would be no risk for your body if you chose the one in your arms.
The lady was horrified and said: 'No doctor! How terrible! It's a crime to kill a child!
'I agree', the doctor replied. 'But you seemed to be ok with it, so I thought maybe that was the best solution.
The doctor smiled, realizing that he had made his point. He convinced the mom that there is no difference in killing a child that's already been born and one that's still in the womb. The crime is the same!
If you agree, please forward this message. Together we can help save precious lives! Please support those who cannot speak for themselves.
GOD BLESS!
problem and desperately need your help! My baby is not even 1 yr. old and I'm pregnant again. I don't want kids so close together.'
So the doctor said: 'Ok, and what do you want me to do?'
She said: 'I want you to end my pregnancy, and I'm counting on your help with this.'
The doctor thought for a little while, and after some silence he said to the lady: 'I think I have a better solution for your problem. It's less dangerous for you too.'
She smiled, thinking that the doctor was going to accept her request.
Then he continued: 'You see, in order for you not to have to take care of two babies at the same time, let's kill the one in your arms. That way, you could rest some before the other one is born. If we're going to kill one of them, it doesn't matter which one it is. There would be no risk for your body if you chose the one in your arms.
The lady was horrified and said: 'No doctor! How terrible! It's a crime to kill a child!
'I agree', the doctor replied. 'But you seemed to be ok with it, so I thought maybe that was the best solution.
The doctor smiled, realizing that he had made his point. He convinced the mom that there is no difference in killing a child that's already been born and one that's still in the womb. The crime is the same!
If you agree, please forward this message. Together we can help save precious lives! Please support those who cannot speak for themselves.
GOD BLESS!
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Fwd: Poison in Pringles potato chips
For those who don't read Chinese:
The chemical used in Pringles is also used in hair-perm chemical, a very harmful chemical even in a very insignificant quantity (will cause kidney cancer), adult shouldn't consume more than 0.01g per day while children not more than 0.003g!
Product called back from all HK markets & banned in USA !! It contains cancer causing ingredients.
Fwd: Amusing Facts
VERY AMUSING STUFF
In the 1400's a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to
beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb. Hence we have 'the
rule of thumb'
-------------------------------------------------------------
Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was invented. It was ruled
'Gentlemen Only...Ladies Forbidden'....and thus the word GOLF entered into
the English language.
------------------------------------------------------------
The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred
and Wilma Flintstone.
------------------------------------------------------------
Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the U.S. Treasury.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Coca-Cola was originally green.
--------------------------------------------------------------
It is impossible to lick your elbow.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
---------------------------------------------------------------
The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.
---------------------------------------------------------------
The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:
Spades - King David, Hearts - Charlemagne Clubs -Alexander, the Great
Diamonds - Julius Caesar
---------------------------------------------------------------
111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
---------------------------------------------------------------
If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the
air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air
the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has
all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
---------------------------------------------------------------
Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name
requested?
A. Obsession
---------------------------------------------------------------
Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until
you would find the letter 'A'?
A. One thousand
---------------------------------------------------------------
Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser
printers all have in common?
A.. All were invented by women.
---------------------------------------------------------------
Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?
A. Honey
---------------------------------------------------------------
In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes.
When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer
to sleep on. Hence the phrase.......... 'goodnight, sleep tight.'
---------------------------------------------------------------
It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month
after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all
the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar
was lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know
today as the honeymoon.
---------------------------------------------------------------
In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts... So in old England ,
when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them 'Mind your
pints and quarts, and settle down.'
It's where we get the phrase 'mind your P's and Q's'
---------------------------------------------------------------
Many years ago in England , pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the
rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they
used the whistle to get some service. 'Wet your whistle' is the phrase
inspired by this practice.
---------------------------------------------------------------
At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow!
---------------------------------------------------------------
- Now....
Don't delete this just because it looks weird. Believe it or not, you can
read it.
I cdnuolt blveiee that I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd what I was rdanieg. The
phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde
Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in what oredr the ltteers in a word are, the
olny iprmoatnt tihng is that the first and last ltteer be in the rghit
pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can stillraed it wouthit a
porbelm. This is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by
istlef, but the word as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?
---------------------------------------------------------------
YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2008 when...
1. You accidentally enter your PIN on the microwave.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that
they don't have e-mail addresses.
6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if
anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.
7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the
screen
8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't even have
the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic
and you turn around to go and get it.
10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.
11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )
12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.
13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this
message.
14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.
15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this
list.
In the 1400's a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to
beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb. Hence we have 'the
rule of thumb'
------------------------------
Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was invented. It was ruled
'Gentlemen Only...Ladies Forbidden'....and thus the word GOLF entered into
the English language.
------------------------------
The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred
and Wilma Flintstone.
------------------------------
Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the U.S. Treasury.
------------------------------
Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.
------------------------------
Coca-Cola was originally green.
------------------------------
It is impossible to lick your elbow.
------------------------------
Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
------------------------------
The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.
------------------------------
The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments.
------------------------------
Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:
Spades - King David, Hearts - Charlemagne Clubs -Alexander, the Great
Diamonds - Julius Caesar
------------------------------
111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
------------------------------
If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the
air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air
the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has
all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
------------------------------
Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name
requested?
A. Obsession
------------------------------
Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until
you would find the letter 'A'?
A. One thousand
------------------------------
Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser
printers all have in common?
A.. All were invented by women.
------------------------------
Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?
A. Honey
------------------------------
In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes.
When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer
to sleep on. Hence the phrase.......... 'goodnight, sleep tight.'
------------------------------
It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month
after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all
the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar
was lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know
today as the honeymoon.
------------------------------
In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts... So in old England ,
when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them 'Mind your
pints and quarts, and settle down.'
It's where we get the phrase 'mind your P's and Q's'
------------------------------
Many years ago in England , pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the
rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they
used the whistle to get some service. 'Wet your whistle' is the phrase
inspired by this practice.
------------------------------
At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow!
------------------------------
- Now....
Don't delete this just because it looks weird. Believe it or not, you can
read it.
I cdnuolt blveiee that I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd what I was rdanieg. The
phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde
Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in what oredr the ltteers in a word are, the
olny iprmoatnt tihng is that the first and last ltteer be in the rghit
pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can stillraed it wouthit a
porbelm. This is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by
istlef, but the word as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?
------------------------------
YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2008 when...
1. You accidentally enter your PIN on the microwave.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that
they don't have e-mail addresses.
6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if
anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.
7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the
screen
8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't even have
the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic
and you turn around to go and get it.
10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.
11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )
12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.
13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this
message.
14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.
15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this
list.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Fwd: A FACTORY IN RUSSIA ... BELIEVE IT OR NOT?
:: WARNING ::
If you are offended by gruesome or some mild nudity, please do not scroll down any further for this post.
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If you are offended by gruesome or some mild nudity, please do not scroll down any further for this post.
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Human parts processing factory (like sardines)
A factory in Russia harvesting kidneys, eye corneas and other human body parts for sale.
Bodies are collected from drunk drivers who died in car accidents, people staying alone who had frozen to death in the cold winter, criminals on death row or unexplained death and unclaimed bodies. Some body parts and bones are sold to Universities in various parts of the world. Leg bones are exported to pharmacies in Ireland and Germany to make tooth-fillings which is popular in Europe .
Other than Russia , India is also known to harvest human parts for export
\
PASS THIS ON TO AS MANY AS POSSIBLE, ESPECIALLY TO ALL FRIENDS OVERSEAS TOO!
What a shocking trend!!
Friends be very very careful, when you go out in public & also do not hang around with people you have just met. Avoid going about alone at night. This can happen to both females & males too. Also thought is being given to the child who passed away at the Kuliyapitiya hospital recently whose body was found minus some organs at the mortury !
Stay close to your little ones, kids as they are easiest to be grabbed into a vehile & taken away. There was a mention of a human body parts factory in India too. They may well have associates over here too.
So for what it's worth to be careful of you & your family
What a shocking trend!!
Friends be very very careful, when you go out in public & also do not hang around with people you have just met. Avoid going about alone at night. This can happen to both females & males too. Also thought is being given to the child who passed away at the Kuliyapitiya hospital recently whose body was found minus some organs at the mortury !
Stay close to your little ones, kids as they are easiest to be grabbed into a vehile & taken away. There was a mention of a human body parts factory in India too. They may well have associates over here too.
So for what it's worth to be careful of you & your family
Fwd: Horoscope by Criss Angel
Criss Angel demonstrated how this worked on one of his shows, but it was still surprising when I checked out several people. Not superstitious, but figured we can all use all the luck we can get..
Once you have opened this e-mail, continue as follows: Read about your sign, and then forward it on, with your zodiac sign and label on the subject line. This is the real deal, try ignoring or changing it, and the first thing you'll notice is having a tough day, starting tomorrow morning - and it might get worse..
Remember , if you are on the cusp of another sign you most likely will have features of both signs...which may lead to a little overlapping
CAPRICORN - The Go- Getter (Dec 22 - Jan 19) Patient and wise. Practical and rigid. Ambitious. Tends to be Good-looking. Humorous and funny. Can be a bit shy and reserved. Often pessimistic. Capricorns tend to act before they think and can be Unfriendly at times. Hold grudges. Like competition. Get what they want. 20 years of good luck if you forward.
AQUARIUS - The Sweetheart (Jan 20 - Feb 18) Optimistic and honest. Sweet personality. Very independent.. Inventive and intelligent. Friendly and loyal. Can seem unemotional. Can be a bit rebellious. Very stubborn, but original and unique. Attractive on the inside and out. Eccentric personality. 11 years of luck if you forward.
PISCES - The Dreamer (Feb 19 - Mar 20) Generous, kind, and thoughtful. Very creative and imaginative. May become secretive and vague. S ens itive. Dreamy and unrealistic. Sympathetic and loving. Kind. Unselfish. Good kisser. Beautiful. 8 years of good luck if you forward.
ARIES - The Daredevil (Mar 21 - April 19)
Energetic. Adventurous and spontaneous. Confident and enthusiastic. Fun.. Loves a challenge. EXTREMELY impatient. Sometimes selfish.. Short fuse. (Easily angered..) Lively, passionate, and sharp wit. Outgoing. Lose interest quickly - easily bored. Egotistical. Courageous and assertive. Tends to be physical and athletic. 16 years of good luck if you forward.
TAURUS - The Enduring One (April 20 - May 20) Charming but aggressive. Can come off as boring, but they are not.. Hard workers. Warm-hearted. Strong, has endurance. Solid beings that are stable and secure in their ways. Not looking for shortcuts. Take pride in their beauty. Patient and reliable. Make great friends and give good advice. Loving and kind. Loves hard - passionate. Express themselves emotionally. Prone to ferocious temper-tantrums. Determined. Indulge themselves often. Very generous. 12 years of good Luck if you forward
GEMINI - The Chatterbox (May 21 - June 20) Smart and witty. Outgoing, very chatty. Lively, energetic.. Adaptable but needs to express themselves . Argumentative and outspoken. Like change. Versatile. Busy, sometimes nervous and t ens e. Gossips. May seem superficial or inconsistent. Beautiful physically and mentally. 5 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
CANCER - The Protector (June 21 - July 22)
Moody, emotional. May be shy. Very loving and caring. Pretty/handsome. Excellent partners for life.. Protective. Inventive and imaginative. Cautious. Touchy-feely kind of person. Needs love from others. Easily hurt, but sympathetic. 16 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
LEO - The Boss (July 23 - Aug 22)
Very organized. Need order in their lives - like being in control. Like boundaries. Tend to take over everything. Bossy. Like to help Others. Social and outgoing. Extroverted. Generous, warm-hearted. S ens itive. Creative energy. Full of themselves. Loving. Doing the right thing is important to Leos. Attractive. 13 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
VIRGO - The Perfectionist (Aug 23 - Sept 22)
Dominant In relationships. Conservative. Always wants the last word. Argumentative. Worries. Very smart. Dislikes noise and chaos. Eager. Hard working. Loyal. Beautiful. Easy to talk to. Hard to please. Harsh. Practical and very fussy. Often shy. Pessimistic. 7 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
LIBRA - The Harmonizer (Sept 23 - Oct 22)
Nice to everyone they meet. Can't make up their mind. Have own unique appeal. Creative, energetic, and very social. Hates to be alone.. Peaceful , generous. Very loving and beautiful.. Flirtatious. Give in too easily. Procrastinators. Very gullible. 9 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
SCORPIO - The Int ens e One (Oct 23 - Nov 21)
Very energetic. Intelligent. Can be jealous and/or possessive. Hardworking. Great kisser.. Can become obsessive or secretive. Holds grudges. Attractive. Determined. Loves being in long Relationships. Talkative. Romantic. Can be se lf-centered at times. Passionate and Emotional. 4 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
SAGITTARIUS - The Happy-Go-Lucky One (Nov 22 - Dec 21)
Good-natured optimist. Doesn't want to grow up (Peter Pan Syndrome). Indulges self . Boastful. Likes luxuries and gambling. Social and outgoing. Doesn't like responsibilities. Often fantasizes. Impatient. Fun to be around. Having lots of friends. Flirtatious. Doesn't like rules. Sometimes hypocritical. Dislikes being confined - tight spaces or even tight clothes. Doesn't like being doubted. Beautiful inside and out. 14 years of bad luck if you do not forward .
Send away!! ~ Ready, set, go!
1-3 people = 1 minute of luck
4-7 people = 1 hour of luck
8-12 people = 1 day of luck
13-17 People = 1 week of luck
18-22 people = 1 month of luck
23-27 people = 3 Months of luck
28-32 people = 7 months of luck
33-37 people = 1 year of luck
Once you have opened this e-mail, continue as follows: Read about your sign, and then forward it on, with your zodiac sign and label on the subject line. This is the real deal, try ignoring or changing it, and the first thing you'll notice is having a tough day, starting tomorrow morning - and it might get worse..
Remember , if you are on the cusp of another sign you most likely will have features of both signs...which may lead to a little overlapping
CAPRICORN - The Go- Getter (Dec 22 - Jan 19) Patient and wise. Practical and rigid. Ambitious. Tends to be Good-looking. Humorous and funny. Can be a bit shy and reserved. Often pessimistic. Capricorns tend to act before they think and can be Unfriendly at times. Hold grudges. Like competition. Get what they want. 20 years of good luck if you forward.
AQUARIUS - The Sweetheart (Jan 20 - Feb 18) Optimistic and honest. Sweet personality. Very independent.. Inventive and intelligent. Friendly and loyal. Can seem unemotional. Can be a bit rebellious. Very stubborn, but original and unique. Attractive on the inside and out. Eccentric personality. 11 years of luck if you forward.
PISCES - The Dreamer (Feb 19 - Mar 20) Generous, kind, and thoughtful. Very creative and imaginative. May become secretive and vague. S ens itive. Dreamy and unrealistic. Sympathetic and loving. Kind. Unselfish. Good kisser. Beautiful. 8 years of good luck if you forward.
ARIES - The Daredevil (Mar 21 - April 19)
Energetic. Adventurous and spontaneous. Confident and enthusiastic. Fun.. Loves a challenge. EXTREMELY impatient. Sometimes selfish.. Short fuse. (Easily angered..) Lively, passionate, and sharp wit. Outgoing. Lose interest quickly - easily bored. Egotistical. Courageous and assertive. Tends to be physical and athletic. 16 years of good luck if you forward.
TAURUS - The Enduring One (April 20 - May 20) Charming but aggressive. Can come off as boring, but they are not.. Hard workers. Warm-hearted. Strong, has endurance. Solid beings that are stable and secure in their ways. Not looking for shortcuts. Take pride in their beauty. Patient and reliable. Make great friends and give good advice. Loving and kind. Loves hard - passionate. Express themselves emotionally. Prone to ferocious temper-tantrums. Determined. Indulge themselves often. Very generous. 12 years of good Luck if you forward
GEMINI - The Chatterbox (May 21 - June 20) Smart and witty. Outgoing, very chatty. Lively, energetic.. Adaptable but needs to express themselves . Argumentative and outspoken. Like change. Versatile. Busy, sometimes nervous and t ens e. Gossips. May seem superficial or inconsistent. Beautiful physically and mentally. 5 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
CANCER - The Protector (June 21 - July 22)
Moody, emotional. May be shy. Very loving and caring. Pretty/handsome. Excellent partners for life.. Protective. Inventive and imaginative. Cautious. Touchy-feely kind of person. Needs love from others. Easily hurt, but sympathetic. 16 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
LEO - The Boss (July 23 - Aug 22)
Very organized. Need order in their lives - like being in control. Like boundaries. Tend to take over everything. Bossy. Like to help Others. Social and outgoing. Extroverted. Generous, warm-hearted. S ens itive. Creative energy. Full of themselves. Loving. Doing the right thing is important to Leos. Attractive. 13 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
VIRGO - The Perfectionist (Aug 23 - Sept 22)
Dominant In relationships. Conservative. Always wants the last word. Argumentative. Worries. Very smart. Dislikes noise and chaos. Eager. Hard working. Loyal. Beautiful. Easy to talk to. Hard to please. Harsh. Practical and very fussy. Often shy. Pessimistic. 7 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
LIBRA - The Harmonizer (Sept 23 - Oct 22)
Nice to everyone they meet. Can't make up their mind. Have own unique appeal. Creative, energetic, and very social. Hates to be alone.. Peaceful , generous. Very loving and beautiful.. Flirtatious. Give in too easily. Procrastinators. Very gullible. 9 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
SCORPIO - The Int ens e One (Oct 23 - Nov 21)
Very energetic. Intelligent. Can be jealous and/or possessive. Hardworking. Great kisser.. Can become obsessive or secretive. Holds grudges. Attractive. Determined. Loves being in long Relationships. Talkative. Romantic. Can be se lf-centered at times. Passionate and Emotional. 4 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
SAGITTARIUS - The Happy-Go-Lucky One (Nov 22 - Dec 21)
Good-natured optimist. Doesn't want to grow up (Peter Pan Syndrome). Indulges self . Boastful. Likes luxuries and gambling. Social and outgoing. Doesn't like responsibilities. Often fantasizes. Impatient. Fun to be around. Having lots of friends. Flirtatious. Doesn't like rules. Sometimes hypocritical. Dislikes being confined - tight spaces or even tight clothes. Doesn't like being doubted. Beautiful inside and out. 14 years of bad luck if you do not forward .
Send away!! ~ Ready, set, go!
1-3 people = 1 minute of luck
4-7 people = 1 hour of luck
8-12 people = 1 day of luck
13-17 People = 1 week of luck
18-22 people = 1 month of luck
23-27 people = 3 Months of luck
28-32 people = 7 months of luck
33-37 people = 1 year of luck
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Fwd: How to Find, Remove and Prevent Pop-Ups
One way to avoid the potential danger lurking behind pop-up ads is to install software that blocks them. Many ISPs offer tools to stop pop-ups from appearing. The Mozilla browser does not allow pop-ups. The Google Toolbar also blocks pop-up ads.
There are numerous programs that block pop-ups. Before installing them, research the developer and the company to make sure they are legitimate. Also be sure to note how they effect your system. Some pop-up blockers may discourage new windows, such as instant messages being sent to you, from opening.
Click here for a list of pop-up blocking software:
http://www.webattack.com/Freeware/misctools/fwpopblock.shtml.
Windows Messenger Pop-Ups
One relatively new form of pop-up that has been annoying Internet users with potentially dangerous effects is spam being sent using the Windows Messaging feature in Windows XP. This is not the instant messaging software that is used by millions of computer users, but rather an administrative tool that is meant to be used by systems administrators to contact users.
While there are utilities that claim to stop such pop-ups, the Windows Messenger feature is relatively easy to disable. To disable the Windows Messenger in Windows XP:
In Windows XP --> Control Panel --> Administrative Tools. Double-click Services. Double-click
Messenger. In the Startup type list, choose Disabled. Click Stop, and then click OK.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Fwd: Cute uniformed korean dancing to song "NOBODY"
The Wonder Girls (Korean: 원더걸스) are a South Korean girl group. They are produced by singer-songwriter Park Jin-Young and are signed to his talent agency, JYP Entertainment. Each of the five original members were selected through auditions. Debuting in early 2007, they became popular in the fall of that year with the song "Tell Me."
Since then they have scored 3 consecutive #1 hit singles with "Tell Me", "So Hot", and "Nobody", and in 2008, won two Daesangs ("Artist of the Year" Awards).
Check out this clip of a cute korean boy dancing to their No.1 hit Nobody
Since then they have scored 3 consecutive #1 hit singles with "Tell Me", "So Hot", and "Nobody", and in 2008, won two Daesangs ("Artist of the Year" Awards).
Check out this clip of a cute korean boy dancing to their No.1 hit Nobody
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Fwd: Gary Ng (garyng174) Videos
HE HAS an ordinary day job as a surveyor in a bunkering firm, but he also leads a secret life as an amateur pornographer.
 |
| TNP PHOTO ILLUSTRATION |
And Gary Ng, 29, is fast gaining online notoriety after his self-filmed sex videos - posted on various amateur porn sites and sex forums - caused an uproar among local netizens.
The 33 videos, which have since been removed from those sites, featured him having sex with several women who, he claims, are from all walks of life.
The New Paper on Sunday managed to get in touch with Mr Ng through his e-mail address, which he displays on his videos.
In an online interview, he said he had removed the videos from the porn sites, but had later posted them on another website for his 'fans'.
Most of the videos begin with him in office wear before he undresses.
The video titles are telling - 'Gary Ng vs Beer Promo Auntie', 'Gary Ng vs Friend's Niece' and 'Gary Ng vs Chua Chu Kang girl' - just to name a few.
He even claimed to have had sex with a mother and her daughter on two different occasions. His other conquests range from waitresses and housewives to tertiary students and bank executives, he said.
When asked if Gary Ng is his real name, he said it is.
 |
To attract netizens to view his videos, he also posted links on sex forums, where he has been given the dubious honour of being called Singapore's Edison Chen.
News Source: AsiaOne
Video Source: GaryNg174.blogspot.com
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Fwd: Brasil Underwear Day
The third National Underwear Day in Brazil organized on 17th Feb 2009 at downtown Brasilia. The event is organized by fashion website Finissimo, and all models who took place in the event final wear only .... what else but underwear.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Fwd: St Patrick's Day Drunk
A St. Patrick's Day partier is arrested for being drunk in public by Glenn County sheriff's deputies and a plainclothes Alcoholic Beverage Control officer at about 4:20 p.m. Friday on the 700 block of Nord Avenue.
Whether drinking green beer at 10 a.m., wearing all-green clothes or staying home, Chico State students celebrated St. Patrick's Day in a relatively calm fashion.
According to Chico police, there were 58 arrests made on Friday, down from 69 in 2005. Thirty-eight of the arrests were for drunk in public violations.
No major acts of violence, such as stabbings or shootings, were reported.
This is a positive step, said Chico police Lt. Mike Weber, who served as the operations commander for the holiday.
Rainy weather, students on spring break and cooperation from the community contributed to the reduced number of arrests, he said.
Saturday was also much calmer than expected with only 21 arrests.
Although the number of arrests was down, it was still too many, Weber said.
"We are still in a position where we have to increase outside staff and jail support," he said.
Alcoholic Beverage Control officers, University Police and jail support from Butte and Glenn counties assisted the Chico Police Department.
The eventual goal is to not need any outside help at all, Weber said.
"We want to be able to handle St. Patrick's Day like any busy Friday," he said.
Most bars voluntarily opened their doors later to curb early morning drinking, but crowds were mostly small at 10 a.m. Friday.
Fwd: Take care of yoursel
>>>>>> > > 粉色题板
>>>>>> > > 1. 在干净的床上裸睡
>>>>>> > > 2. 生理期不吃巧克力，因为会加重痛经
>>>>>> > > 3. 养成记录生理周期的习惯
>>>>>> > > 4. 通过运动而非调整型内衣来塑造曲线
>>>>>> > > 5. 不翘二郎腿，以免压迫神经
>>>>>> > > 6. 贴身衣物不干洗
>>>>>> > > 7. 拉风的丁字裤不适宜日常穿着
>>>>>> > > 8. 去年的衣服要进行曝晒后才可以穿
>>>>>> > > 9. 如非必要，不使用卫生护垫
>>>>>> > > 10. 定期检查化妆品的保质期
>>>>>> > > 11. 洗浴后一小时再化妆
>>>>>> > > 12. 即使爱美，也不要在耳朵上部的外缘软骨部位穿耳洞
>>>>>> > > 13. 了解自己的家庭病史，特别是母亲和外婆的病史
>>>>>> > >
>>>>>> > > 蓝色题板
>>>>>> > > 1. 每天踏进办公室，先将窗户打开透气，再坐下来工作
>>>>>> > > 2. 如果一天要接听5小时电话，使用无线耳机
>>>>>> > > 3. 复印文件时，与复印机保持至少一米
>>>>>> > > 4. 只在非常必要时才使用滴眼液
>>>>>> > > 5. 不趴在办公桌上午睡
>>>>>> > > 6. 在办公室为自己准备小靠垫，放在腰部
>>>>>> > > 7. 不要将笔记本电脑放在膝上使用
>>>>>> > > 8. 在办公桌上养一盆仙人掌，帮助吸收辐射
>>>>>> > > 9. 阅读完报纸后，记得清洗掉沾在手上的油墨
>>>>>> > > 10. 每30分钟伸一次懒腰
>>>>>> > > 11. 办公室地毯定期清洗杀虫
>>>>>> > > 12. 用完电脑后要清洁面部及手部，清除辐射微尘
>>>>>> > > 13. 单肩的短带挎包会加重肩周炎症状
>>>>>> > > 14. 公文包时的口红与签字笔分格存放
>>>>>> > > 15. 每天保证有2小时以上的时间，让脚从高跟鞋时解放出来
>>>>>> > > 16. 每周晚过22：00的加班不超过一次
>>>>>> > >
>>>>>> > > 绿色题板
>>>>>> > > 1. 浴室保持干燥，防止霉菌滋生
>>>>>> > > 2. 沐浴不超过10分钟
>>>>>> > > 3. 用温水刷牙，同时刷刷舌头
>>>>>> > > 4. 用冷热水交替洗脸
>>>>>> > > 5. 不用塑料器皿盛装热水
>>>>>> > > 6. 定期清理冰箱
>>>>>> > > 7. 微波炉在工作时，请离开厨房
>>>>>> > > 8. 使用抽油烟机
>>>>>> > > 9. 晚餐时关掉电视机
>>>>>> > > 10. 尽量避免使用厚绒布窗帘
>>>>>> > > 11. 杀虫剂和清洁剂要放在远离起居场所的储物间
>>>>>> > > 12. 用天然的花香或果香代替芳香剂
>>>>>> > > 13. 冬天居室里的加湿器使用纯净水
>>>>>> > > 14. 不要贪图方便将电脑带进卧室
>>>>>> > > 15. 不要把手机放在枕边充当闹钟
>>>>>> > > 16. 头发没干时，别急着入睡
>>>>>> > > 17. 卧室的房间要用柔和色彩
>>>>>> > >
>>>>>> > > 黄色题板
>>>>>> > > 1. 在牛奶和豆浆之间，选择后者
>>>>>> > > 2. 觉得还可以再吃半碗饭时，离开餐桌
>>>>>> > > 3. 如果身体不感到饥渴，每天只需饮用4杯水
>>>>>> > > 4. 多喝酸奶
>>>>>> > > 5. 无论什么原因，都别抽烟
>>>>>> > > 6. 在食谱里添加杂粮和蔬菜
>>>>>> > > 7. 饮绿茶胜过红茶
>>>>>> > > 8. 重视早餐多过晚餐
>>>>>> > > 9. 控制盐的用量
>>>>>> > > 10. 起床后先刷牙，再喝水
>>>>>> > > 11. 经常嚼口香糖
>>>>>> > > 12. 一早一晚，两个苹果可以有效改善便秘
>>>>>> > > 13. 纯素食可能导致荷尔蒙分泌异常，造成不孕
>>>>>> > > 14. 每周至少吃一次鱼
>>>>>> > > 15. 远离可乐等碳酸饮料
>>>>>> > > 16. 不喝久煮的火锅汤
>>>>>> > > 17. 没有果汁牛奶这回事，它们是天生的冤家
>>>>>> > > 18. 饭前吃水果胜过饭后
>>>>>> > > 19. 睡前可以来一杯红葡萄酒
>>>>>> > > 20. 喝咖啡可能引起女性骨质疏松
>>>>>> > >
>>>>>> > > 橙色题板
>>>>>> > > 1. 多享受早晨8－9点的阳光
>>>>>> > > 2. 跑步、骑脚踏车等运动可以保持优美的腿部线条
>>>>>> > > 3. 热水泡脚可有效预防静脉曲张
>>>>>> > > 4. 精神极度疲倦时并不适宜以运动减压，休息更重要
>>>>>> > > 1. 在干净的床上裸睡
>>>>>> > > 2. 生理期不吃巧克力，因为会加重痛经
>>>>>> > > 3. 养成记录生理周期的习惯
>>>>>> > > 4. 通过运动而非调整型内衣来塑造曲线
>>>>>> > > 5. 不翘二郎腿，以免压迫神经
>>>>>> > > 6. 贴身衣物不干洗
>>>>>> > > 7. 拉风的丁字裤不适宜日常穿着
>>>>>> > > 8. 去年的衣服要进行曝晒后才可以穿
>>>>>> > > 9. 如非必要，不使用卫生护垫
>>>>>> > > 10. 定期检查化妆品的保质期
>>>>>> > > 11. 洗浴后一小时再化妆
>>>>>> > > 12. 即使爱美，也不要在耳朵上部的外缘软骨部位穿耳洞
>>>>>> > > 13. 了解自己的家庭病史，特别是母亲和外婆的病史
>>>>>> > >
>>>>>> > > 蓝色题板
>>>>>> > > 1. 每天踏进办公室，先将窗户打开透气，再坐下来工作
>>>>>> > > 2. 如果一天要接听5小时电话，使用无线耳机
>>>>>> > > 3. 复印文件时，与复印机保持至少一米
>>>>>> > > 4. 只在非常必要时才使用滴眼液
>>>>>> > > 5. 不趴在办公桌上午睡
>>>>>> > > 6. 在办公室为自己准备小靠垫，放在腰部
>>>>>> > > 7. 不要将笔记本电脑放在膝上使用
>>>>>> > > 8. 在办公桌上养一盆仙人掌，帮助吸收辐射
>>>>>> > > 9. 阅读完报纸后，记得清洗掉沾在手上的油墨
>>>>>> > > 10. 每30分钟伸一次懒腰
>>>>>> > > 11. 办公室地毯定期清洗杀虫
>>>>>> > > 12. 用完电脑后要清洁面部及手部，清除辐射微尘
>>>>>> > > 13. 单肩的短带挎包会加重肩周炎症状
>>>>>> > > 14. 公文包时的口红与签字笔分格存放
>>>>>> > > 15. 每天保证有2小时以上的时间，让脚从高跟鞋时解放出来
>>>>>> > > 16. 每周晚过22：00的加班不超过一次
>>>>>> > >
>>>>>> > > 绿色题板
>>>>>> > > 1. 浴室保持干燥，防止霉菌滋生
>>>>>> > > 2. 沐浴不超过10分钟
>>>>>> > > 3. 用温水刷牙，同时刷刷舌头
>>>>>> > > 4. 用冷热水交替洗脸
>>>>>> > > 5. 不用塑料器皿盛装热水
>>>>>> > > 6. 定期清理冰箱
>>>>>> > > 7. 微波炉在工作时，请离开厨房
>>>>>> > > 8. 使用抽油烟机
>>>>>> > > 9. 晚餐时关掉电视机
>>>>>> > > 10. 尽量避免使用厚绒布窗帘
>>>>>> > > 11. 杀虫剂和清洁剂要放在远离起居场所的储物间
>>>>>> > > 12. 用天然的花香或果香代替芳香剂
>>>>>> > > 13. 冬天居室里的加湿器使用纯净水
>>>>>> > > 14. 不要贪图方便将电脑带进卧室
>>>>>> > > 15. 不要把手机放在枕边充当闹钟
>>>>>> > > 16. 头发没干时，别急着入睡
>>>>>> > > 17. 卧室的房间要用柔和色彩
>>>>>> > >
>>>>>> > > 黄色题板
>>>>>> > > 1. 在牛奶和豆浆之间，选择后者
>>>>>> > > 2. 觉得还可以再吃半碗饭时，离开餐桌
>>>>>> > > 3. 如果身体不感到饥渴，每天只需饮用4杯水
>>>>>> > > 4. 多喝酸奶
>>>>>> > > 5. 无论什么原因，都别抽烟
>>>>>> > > 6. 在食谱里添加杂粮和蔬菜
>>>>>> > > 7. 饮绿茶胜过红茶
>>>>>> > > 8. 重视早餐多过晚餐
>>>>>> > > 9. 控制盐的用量
>>>>>> > > 10. 起床后先刷牙，再喝水
>>>>>> > > 11. 经常嚼口香糖
>>>>>> > > 12. 一早一晚，两个苹果可以有效改善便秘
>>>>>> > > 13. 纯素食可能导致荷尔蒙分泌异常，造成不孕
>>>>>> > > 14. 每周至少吃一次鱼
>>>>>> > > 15. 远离可乐等碳酸饮料
>>>>>> > > 16. 不喝久煮的火锅汤
>>>>>> > > 17. 没有果汁牛奶这回事，它们是天生的冤家
>>>>>> > > 18. 饭前吃水果胜过饭后
>>>>>> > > 19. 睡前可以来一杯红葡萄酒
>>>>>> > > 20. 喝咖啡可能引起女性骨质疏松
>>>>>> > >
>>>>>> > > 橙色题板
>>>>>> > > 1. 多享受早晨8－9点的阳光
>>>>>> > > 2. 跑步、骑脚踏车等运动可以保持优美的腿部线条
>>>>>> > > 3. 热水泡脚可有效预防静脉曲张
>>>>>> > > 4. 精神极度疲倦时并不适宜以运动减压，休息更重要
Monday, March 16, 2009
Fwd: Types of Ads husband put up for Wife on Sale
A British man, fed up with his wife’s complaints, advertised her for sale — and got a number of offers.
“Nagging Wife. No Tax . .. Very high maintenance — some rust,” wrote Gary Bates, 38, in a small ad in Trade-It, more usually used to buy and sell cars or household goods.
Bates, a self-employed builder from Gloucestershire, southwest England, snapped after his wife, Donna, got on his nerves while she was watching television and decided to place the advert as a joke.
“She was nagging me for doing something small, while she was watching some rubbish on TV. So I just thought I’d put an ad in to get rid of her.
“I didn’t think anyone would ring up, but I’ve had people calling about her. It’s gone mad. There was no one I knew — just people asking, ‘Is she still available?’”
The couple only married last year, and Bates said his 40-year-old wife — whom he advertised in the magazine’s “Free to Collect” section, along with some of his fishing tackle — initially gave him “a bit of an ear-bashing”. But he added: “She’s seen the funny side of it now!” — AFPHere are the rest of the ads husbands had put up for Wife on Sale!
Would you buy?
Would you buy?
Fwd: Especially to people who are about to get married
#CASE 1
Getting married is like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.
#CASE 2
At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger??" The other replied, "Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."
#CASE 3
Before a man is married, he is incomplete. Then when he is married, he is finished.
#CASE 4
Marriage is an institution in which a man losses his bachelor's degree and the woman gets her master's status.
#CASE 5
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married??" And the father replied, "I don't know son, I'm
still paying for it."
#CASE 6
Young son : "Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"
Dad : "That happens in most countries son."
#CASE 7
Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and then it was too late."
#CASE 8
A happy marriage is a matter of give and take; the husband gives and the wife takes
#CASE 9
When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a ten-year married man looks happy, we wonder why. Affair ?
#CASE 10
In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.
#CASE 11
After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." And the Husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice it."
#CASE 12
A man inserted an 'ad' in the classified : "Wife wanted". The next day, he received hundreds letters. They all said the same thing "You can have mine."
#CASE 13
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing : either the car is new or his wife is new.
#CASE 14
A woman was telling her friend : "It is I who made my husband a millionaire."
"And what was he before you married him?" the friend asked. The woman replied, "A Billionaire."
Getting married is like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.
#CASE 2
At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger??" The other replied, "Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."
#CASE 3
Before a man is married, he is incomplete. Then when he is married, he is finished.
#CASE 4
Marriage is an institution in which a man losses his bachelor's degree and the woman gets her master's status.
#CASE 5
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married??" And the father replied, "I don't know son, I'm
still paying for it."
#CASE 6
Young son : "Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"
Dad : "That happens in most countries son."
#CASE 7
Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and then it was too late."
#CASE 8
A happy marriage is a matter of give and take; the husband gives and the wife takes
#CASE 9
When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a ten-year married man looks happy, we wonder why. Affair ?
#CASE 10
In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.
#CASE 11
After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." And the Husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice it."
#CASE 12
A man inserted an 'ad' in the classified : "Wife wanted". The next day, he received hundreds letters. They all said the same thing "You can have mine."
#CASE 13
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing : either the car is new or his wife is new.
#CASE 14
A woman was telling her friend : "It is I who made my husband a millionaire."
"And what was he before you married him?" the friend asked. The woman replied, "A Billionaire."
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